Thoughts on Isaiah 26:3 and the loss of Lane Meyer and Zach Ladd

He will keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on Thee.

I just love that God doesn't say "whose eyes are stayed on Thee". Sometimes life is just so dark and the pain so great that we see nothing but that darkness and pain. God's perfect peace does not eliminate the pain but it does give us the moment by moment strength to bear up when it doesn't seem possible that we can draw another breath. Surely the grief alone should stop our hearts and take us home to be with our loved ones. Yet another day comes and we are still here wondering how to navigate this gaping hole in our lives. Getting dressed, brushing teeth, fixing a meal become acts of great endurance. Fatigue stalks us. Grief our constant companion.

I love Elisabeth Elliot's quote "Do the next thing." Some of the best advice I have ever heard. After her missionary husband,Jim Elliot, was murdered by Auca Indians in Ecuador, she was left a widow with a 10 month old baby girl. Yet she returned to Ecuador and was instrumental in bring Christ to the very people who murdered her husband. How did she do it? She took it one moment at a time. She did the next thing.

After great loss, decision making is exceptionally difficult. Focus is lost even in the simplest things. Doing the next thing could be as simple as taking a nap, eating a bite, changing clothes, taking a shower and that is okay. The injury is horrendous and the greater the injury the longer the healing will take but we will never be the same. We will survive but we will never be the same. But God can restore us and give us new hope that all is not lost.

We walk by faith and not by sight. When it is this dark, many times we cannot see or feel God but He is still there. We cannot see this side of heaven what good can come of such loss and honestly we don't care. No answer is sufficient in the raw stages of grief. We want our loved one back. We want the clock to rewind and it all to be a bad dream. But the clock is not going to go backward so we have to find a way to move forward whether we want to or not.

We have to stay our mind on what we know of the character of God and choose to believe what we know while not denying what we feel.

I wrote this poem this morning:

When the days are so dark
that you cannot see,
How can you keep your mind
focused on Thee?

It is by faith we walk dear
not by our sight.
It is not with our eyes dear.
It is not by our might.

Come boldly to the throne dear
to ask for your needs.
He hears your groans dear.
His strength you'll receive.

He is not threatened
by your anger or doubts
He loves you forever.
He will not cast you out.

He has not changed dear
He is the same.
Come sunshine. Come harvest.
Come torrent. Come pain.

When all seems impossible.
When all seems lost.
Remember no glory can come
without first bearing our cross.

Rest in the promises dear
you know to be true.
Rest in what you know dear.
He IS with you.

"And lo I am with you always even to the ends of the age." Matthew 28:20