Limitations or Opportunities

Last summer, I began experiencing pain in my hands, especially when I had to grip anything. The middle finger of my right hand was the first to hurt. (And no, it was not from making ugly gestures in traffic as my dear husband sarcastically suggested.) Slowly, it progressed to both hands, then to elbows, shoulders, neck, and ankles. Monday, I finally received a diagnosis of fibromyalgia. Fibromyalgia is what I have, not who I am.

Fibromyalgia is real and elusive. No cause is known. No cure is known. It occurs more often in women than men. The best explanation is that the nerve endings that report pain, just keep firing for no reason. Your body reacts as if there is a real pain stimulus, causing the muscles to contract. This results in widespread pain and fatigue. The great news is it is not life threatening. Living with fibromyalgia appears to be an ongoing learning curve of pain management. The goal is to maximize the good days and minimize the bad ones. Accept. Adapt. Adjust.

Personally, I blame the Keebler elves. After being cooped up in that tree all day, forced to make cookies with out union benefits, they want a little down time. So at night, they sneak out and whack me with little elf size baseball bats. That aggression has to go somewhere. I haven't caught them yet, but I am sure that is how the cookie crumbs got in my bed. Surely, my husband wouldn't eat cookies in bed and leave crumbs? I didn't think so. I digress. Back to the elves, elves are mean! That cute image is a facade. If I could just catch 'em, I think I could take 'em. This is my theory and I am sticking to it. HHHHmmmmm, maybe it is a good thing I left the medical research field!

Due to the attacks of rogue elves, pain of various intensity greets me most mornings. Fatigue awaits me many evenings. Many hours in between are normal. The variability and unpredictability are frustrating, making it difficult to plan my days. Yet, life is good. Christ is with me every minute of every day. He is teaching me how to ask for help, from Him, my family and others, something I am not very good at. Self-sufficiency comes much more naturally to me.

I tend to live by the "It's just easier to do it yourself than to ask for help." philosophy. Humility, it is a good thing, but painful in its own way to learn. My good days give me hope. My bad days build my faith and teach me to lean hard on my Savior. I am blessed to have an amazingly supportive, loving husband, two wonderful daughters and great Christian friends who pray for me. Life IS good. God IS great, even on my worst day. Everybody has something! This is just my something.


Regardless of whether my pain is Keebler elf-induced or stems from overzealous nerve endings firing indescriminately, I have a choice to make. I can let my symptoms define and control me or I can walk day by day with Christ. I choose door number two. I have no desire to sit around and "what if" myself into depression or worry. Instead of mourning what I can't do, I choose to focus on what I can. God is teaching me something about Him and about me. How good a pupil will I choose to be? The truth is God was sovereign before I was diagnosed and last I checked that hadn't changed. His grace is sufficient.

I will not let a disorder define me or my life. It may alter how I live it, but it doesn't define me. I chose to define myself as Christ defines me since I turned my life completely over to Him: I am a beloved daughter of my King, a royal princess, the apple of His eye. If His eye is on the sparrow, I know He has not lost sight of me. I am a victor, not a victim. How can you win a victory without an opponent?

Fibromyalgia is my opponent. It is also an opportunity for God's strength and grace to shine through in my life. I am blessed. How are you defining yourself today? By your limitations or by your opportunities? What if your limitation is your opportunity? Think about it.

Three Piercing Cries

A piercing cry splits the dawn
On that first Christmas morn.
Salvation draws its first ragged breath
in infant flesh, forlorn.

A piercing cry splits the sky
As demons and darkness rejoice.
Christ crucified; God glorified.
He stayed on the cross, His choice.

A piercing cry splits the dawn
On that first Easter morn.
An empty tomb; promised heavenly rooms
humanity's hope, reborn.

The Cross

The C.R.O.S.S. stands for:

Compassion not condemnation.

Resurrection not resignation.

Obedience not obstinance.

Salvation not survival.

Sanctification not sanctimony.

A Heart from which Gratitude Springs

Thank you for the dreary days of winter
and the starkness of bare trees.
Thank you for the green of new grass
and of freshly budding leaves.

Thank you for the blackest night
and the light daybreak brings.
Thank you for the rain and storms
and the growth that from them springs.

Thank you for the daffodil
and the rose with its thorns.
Thank you for the trilling bird
that helps to greet the morn.

Crashing waves and bubbling brook
both from your hand come.
Shall we thank you only when all is well
and not in the midst of the storms?

Thank you Jesus, please grant me a heart
from which gratitude always springs.
Thank you Jesus for all that transpires,
may I thank you in everything.

Bits and Pieces

If God the Father did not swoop down and spare His innocent son from the suffering of the cross, He will not always swoop down and deliver us from our suffering either. But He will be with us through it all and work it all for good. This is where the rubber hits the road--will you believe as you and your loved ones suffer and no relief seems to be on the horizon?


Unbelief is seeing one set of footprints in the sand and thinking they are yours.

Self-focus leads to self-pity which leads to self-reliance which leads to self-destruction.

Faith is the bridge between our ever-changing emotions and the unchanging truth of God's word. Which side of the bridge will I stand on today?

Sin promises what it cannot deliver and delivers what it cannot promise. Sin promises a short cut to happiness at little to no cost and delivers long-term misery at great expense to yourself and others.

The Cup and The Cross

For consider Him who endured such hostility from sinners against Himself,
Lest you become weary and discouraged in your souls,
You have not yet resisted to bloodshed striving against sin.
Hebrew 12:3-4

O Dear Lord,
help me drink from my cup
'tis not so bitter as Thine.
Though there be dregs,
let me savor the taste of the wine.

Grant me obedience from yielded heart.
Thy will prevail and not mine.
Sustain me with thy mercy and grace.
Unfold thy glorious design.

O Dear Lord
help me take up my cross,
'tis not so rugged as Thine.
Though there be pain,
let suffering my spirit refine.

Beauty will thy form from the ashes,
of the trials we endure on this earth.
Mourning will turn into dancing
as creation awaits its new birth.

The cup and the cross instruct me today
the same way they did for my Lord.
Help me sweet Jesus, I watch and I pray,
A faithful servant be yours.

When the Mountains Fall

God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in time of trouble. Therefore we will not fear, though the mountains slip into the heart of the sea; Psalm 46:1-2


The names roll off the tongue: Grandfather Mountain, Beech Mountain, Sugar Mountain, Blowing Rock, Chimney Rock, Table Rock and many more. These names are familiar to those of us raised in North Carolina. For my family, they evoke memories of summer camping trips and winter Christmas tree expeditions. As long as we have been traveling to the mountains of North Carolina, there has been change. Towns grow. Big box stores spring up. New restaurants appear. Old favorites close. Ah! But the mountains with their recognizable silhouettes, bumps and ridges, they remain the same.

There is a comfort in their familiarity, in their seemingly unchanging nature. As we drive the twisting mountain roads, we orient ourselves by the identifiable contours of each mountain. They dominate the horizon. They define the landscape. They help us know where we are when the roads are turning back on themselves. We all need dependable reference points, and not just while driving in the mountains. We need them in our physical, spiritual and emotional lives. When so much is changing and uncertain, we come to depend upon those “unchanging mountains” in our lives.


Our “mountains” have different names, but they define the landscape of our lives just the same. We call them things like good health, a secure job, healthy parents, a loving spouse, a happy family, financial security, a stable government, or a united church home. What happens to us when one of our mountains crashes into the sea? Suddenly, we are thrust into unfamiliar territory. Often we become disoriented. Our horizon is altered, sometimes drastically. We have to find another way to navigate the sharp curves of life.


Now there is good news. Even if one or more of your mountains has crashed into the sea, there is a way to have a point of reference that never changes. Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever (Hebrews 13:8). Everything else is temporary. Nations fall. Nations rise. People are born and people die. Marriages begin and marriages end. Parents become dependents and dependents become parents, all way too early. The only true security available to us is Christ. He is our Rock, our true Mountain. Everyone and everything else are road signs, pointing us to our Creator and Sustainer.


God designed us to be in fellowship, first with Him and then with others. He works through other people in our lives to reveal His love for us. It is not wrong to grieve when we lose someone or something of importance. We were made to love; therefore we will grieve when that love is lost. However, we do stumble into trouble when we turn things around and begin to worship the gifts instead of the Giver, regardless of how precious the gifts.


The temporary blessings of this earth are just that, temporary. What temporary blessing has God removed? Did you make the mistake of thinking it was permanent? We all do. Did it ever occur to you that you had so much to lose because God had given you so much in the first place? Psalm 121:1-2 says the following:

I will lift my eyes to the mountains; From where shall my help come?
My help comes from the Lord, Who made heaven and earth.

Whatever difficulties you are facing now, whatever your horizon looks like, whatever mountains have slipped into the sea, look up. Look to the Lord. He is there waiting to hold you, to comfort you, to guide you. You are not alone. He will not leave you an orphan. He is always with you. He will supply all your need according to His riches in glory in Christ Jesus (Phil 4:19). He never changes. Let Him love you today.